Usually I attribute a lapse in posting to a break from reality. Up until now the gaps between my posts have been filled with visiting family, hitting the couch for a while, daydreaming. Not this time.
No, my latest absence from this blog was due to what I'll call an overdose of reality. Without giving details about someone else's life, I would like to share my feelings about where the world is going, now that we've seen a different side of it.
What I have learned from venturing out of the blissful bubble that is Justin's and my happy little life is that there are lots of people out there who make really bad choices.
As I contemplate what I have come to know these last few weeks; I am shocked, awed at the fact that I managed to get this far along in my life unscathed by the plague that is addiction, in one form or another. While I am sure there are those who feel completely o.k. with where they're at, I have seen what started out as "normal behavior" spiral into something much more sinister.
Where are we going world? To what end will this quibbling idea of morality bring us? How can we draw lines, expect people not to go to extremes, when young kids are being told that sex, drugs, pornography, are just a natural part of life. "Try it once, just for the experience, " they are told, "just know your limits." Newsflash world, pre-adolescents don't know their limits, CAN'T know their limits. Some say it's not within their psychological capacity ( Kegan) . These kids aren't maturing either, its like they get stuck in a terrible cycle , they can't move past the egoism of the teen years. If you ask me its an epidemic.
I know what you are thinking; I am prude, judgemental. No. I'm not. I have lived a great life, been sheltered from the harsh realities around me, but I am a good listener. I know that many of the people who have chosen such a lifestyle are good people. That's the saddest part. That these good people will never know what I know, never have what I have. A life uninhibited. The freedom to reach far beyong the mediocrity of this everyday life. The foresight to choose my own destiny. I'm not deluded, though you may not believe me, I am speaking from a level of experience that fewer and fewer people have today. Some might say I can't possibly know because I have so little personal experience with drugs, sex, and pornography. I'd argue that that lack of exposure lends to a broader perspective.
I am watching people waste away. I see people spend their best years chasing happiness, constantly running in the wrong direction. Life comes with problems, and I won't say my life is perfect, but I will say that I am free from the burdens of addiction, from the chains of the social expectations that come along with it. It's an incredible gift that I feel incredibly lucky to have.
P.S. I will start up the 30 day challenge again tomorrow. This week's theme will be "camping", since that's what I'll be doing ;)
Kelsey -
ReplyDeleteYou've never met me, I'm Justin's cousin, Jennie (his Uncle Bruce's oldest daughter), but I want you to know that I completely agree. It's hard to see those you love fight - or choose not to fight - against the darker side of life. I also know that sometimes our love for others will help us deal with the cold realities of life. Keep up the good fight and know you're not alone.
-Jennie