Happy Holidays

Amidst the terrors of upcoming finals it seems I have been neglecting my blogging duties, Thanksgiving's already two weeks old and Christmas is right around the corner.Though I am , admittedly, in the throes of school-overload, I want you to know that it has absolutely NOT put a damper on my holiday mood. Which the new married me is discovering means being terribly CRAFTY!!!

Back in the day when I was not married ie; 7 months ago, my Mom was quite the party animal. Whether it was a birthday, Christmas, Valentine's, End-of-School, Make-Over, or Just-Because-We-Felt-Like-It party my Mom always threw an excellent one. I used to chalk it up to our awesome house and video games, but I have realized that this party thing-- it's a real talent, a knack if you will, which requires real dedication...I'm talking bordering on obsessive. I always used to chuckle when my Mom was up late the night before a party, carefully setting out the food in just the way she planned to have it the next day.Then Thanksgiving happened.

See Thanksgiving was coming and I figured that since both last year and my freshman year people had hosted me, that it was time to return the favor. I sent out invites ( which I designed on Adobe Illustator with the help of my friend Micheal Gulden) and started planning. That's when I realized that this knack, this talent...IT'S A GENE!!! No really guys it's in my BLOOD!!!!!!! I had so many ideas, so many plans. My mind jumped dizzingly from one to the other as I twirled from project to project taking pictures, drawing up ideas.Of course it was my first party (ever ever as I told Justin), so it probably won't seem like a big deal from the pictures, but man was I in love with the whole process. I loved the crafts the projects the doodads.(pictured below)I even loved making the turkey(pictured below). In the middle of it I even got to go to a grown-up Stampin-up party thing and trade Christmas cards.I got so into planning that I springboarded right into helping put my dear friend Katie's bridal shower together ( not my first time planning one of those as I am sure you could have guessed :)) Long story short I am sooooo doing a Christmas party, I'm thinking a soup buffet, or maybe Christmas Karaoke, or maybe even... well anyway. Please people, don't think that this is me forcing myself into the oddly shaped cookie cutter that is the culturally-ideal molly mormon.I am having fun and this is totally me!!!!!

In other news we had a truly Christmas-a-riffic weekend. We and our friends Lacee and Matt borrowed their friends' car and we drove down to Pearlridge mall. There we had a boys versus girls Christmas shopping extravaganza ( in other words we went shopping for our husbands and they went shopping for us) After stopping at Spencer's gifts to buy some funny unmentionables for the bride-to-be Katie, we spent the day girl-talking it up as we hunted for man-gifts at reasonable prices. Then we went home and switched spouses to wrap. It ended up being a totally awesome way to go about it because now everyone knows what everyone is getting except for the person who is getting it. I am so glad the Roberts(es) are staying here for Christmas too. Our lone wolf Christmas has become a wolf pack Christmas and I am loving it.

P.S. After Christmas shopping Justin and I were so into the holiday spirit that we made a cardboard fireplace! ( pictured below)

Had to have a fireplace to hang stockings on, made from cardboard, paper, and a little magic...also known as elbow grease.

Lingerie cupcakes by Lacey Krout for Katie's bridal shower!

Like mother like daughter ; I set up the table the night before in the middle of our livingbedroom!

Also I taped our lights under it solely for this picture...

...but in this case Christmas beat Thanskgiving.

Justin made a turkey sandwich--on Thanksgiving. This man marches to his own drum and I love him for it.

                                            Cute kids playing near our table, this is Nikki.

Mr. and Mrs. Roberts, our packmates...I can hear their thoughts as we speak...just like Jacob in Twilight.

Hawaiian Thanksgiving: How to Make a Ti Leaf Cornucopia

Came up with this idea for a centerpiece because I wanted the local culture to be represented in our Thanksgiving spread.

   Materials:

                        -1 paper plate
                        -8 medium-large Ti leaves
                        -tape

       Process:

        Form a structure: Shape the paper plate into the rough shape of a cornucopia by rolling one end tightly and securing with tape. Give the roll a little bend toward the tip once the tape is in place.
                    Braid the brim: Wash 4-5 of your Ti leaves, pat dry leaving the leaves moist. Microwave each leaf in 10 second intervals until they are pliable. ( You should be able to bend them without any tearing or cracking) Place 3 of the leaves lengthwise in front of you and fold the left and right sides toward the middle. Repeat.Use the now folded leaves as sections and braid. As the leaves will probably not be of equal length you will need to feed in another "section" when you come to the end of the shortest. When you come to the end of the shortest leaf bring it to the middle of the braid and tuck it downward; place the section on top of the downward facing leaf end , leaving about 1/2 inch rising above the braid-line. Cross the other two sections over the new section and continue braiding as normal. You can trim the 1/2 inch sticking out later if you want. When the braid reaches the length you want ( which will depend on how many times you want to wrap it around the wide edge of the paper plate-- mine was about 2 1/2 ft) Tie both ends off. Place in the fridge (to keep the leaves fresh) for later use.
             Wrap the structure: Use the remaining Ti leaves to wrap around the rolled paper plate. Start at the wide end and wrap horizantally. I was pretty liberal with the tape, but found that it was possible to tuck the ends under the mid-section of the leaf ( in case you want to be more crafty than I was). You will have to secure the edges closest to both the tight and the open ends with tape.
              Secure the brim: With the rolled paper plate lying tight end toward you, cut a wide, horizantal slit near the edge of the wide, open end. Feed one end of your Ti leaf rope into the slit. If the previous knot you tied does not keep it from slipping out of said slit, re-tie it so it's a little bigger. Turn the structure around so the wide end is facing you and wrap the braid clockwise around the open end. Keep wrapping until the end of the braid and tuck it under the previous row. I had to play around with the rows a little bit to get them to sit tightly, if your rows are sagging a little, gently tuck a the lose row over a tighter one.
               Fill: Fill the cornucopia with whatever your heart desires. I used dried coconut and macadamia nuts as another nod to our location, beautiful North Shore, Hawaii.

       

1-2-3-4:Psychology and Basketball A Potent Mix?

According to Developmental Pyshcologist, Robert Kegan, there are five stages of subject-object realtivity we humans employ. The first stage, during childhood, is one in which we experience reality as moment-by-moment--Kegan  notes that young children will describe a movie by reflecting on a favorite character or an isolated scene without really catching on to the overall plot. As we get older we are able to see "time" as an object  and , in essence, step back to analyze it . This second level of understanding is one we experience through adolesence. What we lack as teens is the ability to make ourselves an object, to assess ourselves from a different point of view; so as teens we often appear narcissistic...in fact according to Kegan we are. Most Adults are at level three, able to curb our self-serving apetites for what we see as the greater good. Kegan claims that many adults never proceed to level four, in which we make the greater good the object and learn to see rules as a means to an end rather than something to be taken in a literal sense. But you don't want to hear all this, you want to hear about my weekend...

Let us begin with Friday night. Late Friday afternoon Justin got back from school at approximately 4:53.09. He was tired from studying but I was HYPER. I had been staring listlessly at my facebook page for about an hour ... utterly unable to unglue my eyes from my computer and be productive. Then my poor husband got home and was tackled to the floor before even setting down his backpack! "Let's do something anything, let's make Kool-aid, let's eat popcorn, let's do it, let's play cards, let's play tennis, I'm bored!!!!" I screamed "Matt called, he and Lace wanna play basketball." he grinned. "NOW?!!:)" I smiled, "Yay let's play basketball!" "Well, he said he would call me when they head over there, " he stated."Let's do something anything, let's make Kool-aid, let's eat popcorn, let's do it, let's play cards, let's play tennis, I'm bored!!!!" I screamed...again. Poor guy, how was he to know my subject-object relativity making had reverted to level one.

So we went and played basketball. Don't worry I sobered up before we got to the gym. By the time the sports dude lowered a hoop for us I was operating solidly at a level two. We played 21 and I only guarded Justin because after all, wouldn't it just be silly for me to try to get the ball from anyone who didn't have a vested interest in my spectacularly batted lashes?Justin seemed to be making meaning in a completely different way ,however, because he certainly didn't have my eyelashes in mind when he slammed his shoulder into my chin. " What is this guy doing," I thought " doesn't he realize this little game of 21 is really just about him paying attention to me?" So I responded the way many a level twoer has, I kicked him right in the bEhind...in front of his friends no less. As you can imagine this did not go over well, but luckily my husband was not on level two so he was gracious about it. Soon some other friends showed up and a 3 on 3 pick-up game started. I was not chosen for either team as I am not particularly good at basketball. "I will sit here and they will all see how terribly gracious I am." I thought, of course when Justin didn't seemed to be looking I turned it instead into a fight, claiming that he should have tried to find a way for me to play too. What I was really struggling with however was getting beyond myself ...getting beyond level two. Needless to say I had some apologizing to do when the level three in me came through.

Today however was a perfect day, I think I even made it to level four a couple of times.Yes truly, an objective synthesis of  "the greater good" was certainly neccesary for the events of the day. Let's just say that "call your own fouls" was a rule that was meant to be broken in order to have an eternal perspective... right? Somehow I am thinking Kegan might not agree... Anyway I made my own team to play in the intramural ,3-on-3 basketball tournament,there were only four girls' teams entered and two of them were predominately made up of cross country runners. Justin describes the game between our two teams as a "controlled fight"... he's probabaly right you know, at one point there were three of us on the ground , clutching desperately at the ball and shouting "No way,no way, no way" "get it , get it ,get it , get it" and " FOOOOOOOOTBAAALL" respectively.What can I say we are runners, I mean running  isn't even that fun if you aren't a fiercely competitive person by nature...and it turns out basketball can get your blood boiling -- who knew?

This IS your home.

This year Justin and I have decided to stay in Hawaii for Christmas. That is one of the (only) downsides to going to school here--expensive airfare.I keep switching between optimism and utter bewilderment about it. I mean, what is Christmas without family? Everything about the holiday is, for me, steeped in family traditions and connections.How can Dec. 25th possibly occur without me seeing my parents and sisters? But see that is one of the hardest commitments you make when you get married, commiting first and foremost to your own nuclear family, at least according to our culture it is...Happily you can usually fufill both obligations simultaneously. This year I can't.
I sat, musing about this particularly difficult reality one day when Justin walked in. My eyes snapped up as I looked him straight on and said stalwartly " We have plenty of money in the account [nevermind that we need every penny of it for next semester's housing and tuition], I absolutely need a trip tp the mainland this Christmas." He looked at me discerningly, ready to blast away my carefully constructed facade."Kels..." he said, "what are you trying to say here?" " I want to go home!" I pouted childishly [no really, lip puckered and everything---it was fantastic] , batting my eyes for good measure. " This is your home." he said seriously, his eyes locked on mine trying to communicate the words his guarded nature wouldn't allow him to say. I wasn't letting him off that easily, I stared up at him, willing myself to look every bit as mesmerisingly cute as Puss-in-Boots. Finally he broke his gaze and choked out " What about our song?Don't you feel that way about me anymore?" whoa...whoa....W-H-O-A...
This is our song-- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hjky7v7JIow
--------I gotta say it, my shy guy sure has away with words...[ needless to say I decided a cozy Christmas with just him would be a cozy Christmas at home.]

Tolerance:A One Way Street

Tolerance, a word used far too much and far too little in my opinion. The way I am talking about it, in a politically charged ( and often misused) way, tolerance means being open to differences; whether cultural, political, religious, or otherwise. The thing is, that in the context of my own life "tolerance" has always been something I was expected to give more of , with far less emphasis on the recieving end. Throughout my life I have had my views challenged, and often reshaped in the name of tolerance. "Be tolerant" my peers urged, when I took a Pro-life view of abortion. "Be tolerant" they commanded when my Dad pulled up with a Prop 8 sticker on his bumper. " Be tolerant" they clamoured, when I related my personal opinion about illegal immigration. The thing is, my peers were right. Often times I was insensitive and close-minded when I formed my opinions. There were many instances in which I could have benfited from hearing another's point of view, from having sympathy for someone who was struggling. I honestly want to be kind and understanding to everyone regardless of who they are, or where their life has taken them. It's a hard thing to do. What I think my peers really wanted though was something different.
For many "be tolerant" means "change your opinion so that it is the same as mine".  Take this logic for example: "Be tolerant of those who consider abortion Kelsey,  you don't understand their situation..." ---"OK I guess that's fair" ---" So you're pro-choice now right?" ----"ummm-no" I should sympathize more with those in the tough situation of an unwanted pregnancy, it's true I haven't been in the situation myself and I couldn't understand how hard it is. I should not judge those who have chosen a legal abortion, I should not hate them, or say or do anything to hurt or harm them. But that does not mean I have to advocate abortion --or even the right to it.As far as the law goes, it is my right to vote for or against something  based on my own opinion, whether that fits in with someone else's agenda or not. And guess what else? I can vote with my religious beliefs in mind, just as much as I can vote based on what the Crazy 8 ball told me the night before...that's my right in a democratic society and one that has been extolled as a basic human right in this Country as well.
So many people have told me to "be tolerant", but in the process of saying it have lacked tolerance toward me. Be tolerant peers, of my religious views and their role in the formation of my personal opinons. Be tolerant friends, of my choice to marry young, to keep the Sabbath day holy, to have a lot of children, to abstain from caffeine. Don't post malicious comments or videos on facebook or your blog about Mormons and how they are crazy or cultish or nerdy or pompous or intolerant. Because that friends is just simply not tolerant.

Do I Still Believe?

Lately I seem to be asking myself  a certain question with increasing frequency. I keep on asking myself " Do I believe this?" Do I still believe in the doctrine and principles I have been taught and have had faith in for so long. At first this constant jumping into my head of the very same question thing concerned me. Did this recurring question represent a dwindling of my faith? I realized to day that this is not the case. I realized that the question comes not as a result of doubt, but rather of investing myself more fully in the gospel. The question itself is of little consequence when compared with the answer. I have decided that it really doesn't matter how many times I ask myself if I truly am a Latter Day Saint, because the anwer is and will always be yes. I have recieved a witness, multiple witnesses really, that God lives.
        " I had seen a vision; I knew it, and I knew that God knew it, and I could not deny it, neither dared I          do it; at least I knew that by so doing I would offend God, and come under condemnation. "
                                                                                                                   --Joseph Smith Jr

Thrifty

I'm starting to get the feeling that Justin and I might be exceptionally cautious spenders. The hunch started in the cereal isle. Justin and I have come to an agreement on cereal, since it's a staple food in our house we allow ourselves to buy what we like, regardless of price. Haha...at least we are supposed to. As we stood there deciding I couldn't help but notice a little yellow sale tag waving triumphantly from  HGGUHHHHHHHHHGAASP--the brand name section! We walked on over and the sight of that tag placed just below that irresistably colorful box with Fred Flintstone on the front and Justin shouted gleefully " FRUITY DYNO-BITES!!!" Apparently we haven't been giving ourselves as much license as we thought... This suspicion was confirmed when Justin said we could buy the name brand soda (just this once) and I automatically assumed that meant Shasta. Also we spent more time than I care to tell trying to figure out whether 2/7.00 for 1.75 oz. was a better deal than 6.07 for a gallon...I leave you to be the judge.